Take the Bitter Medicine

“Take the bitter medicine.” - she said.

Several months ago, I attended a womb healing weekend workshop. I left with many new perspectives, tools and relationship to my healing path. I recall the facilitator speaking to the notion of her own current practice of opening to taking the bitter medicine. This can be literal - the herb that is bitter and needed. This can be metaphorical - the words to be said or received that do not pass through easily. The action that stings you or another, though will precipitate improved conditions for all. This is tough love.

My mom, I love her. She taught me about tough love. She knows her boundaries. Growing up she made it very clear that she was my mother, not my friend. This made it easy for her to say no to the things she knew better about. It’s taken thirty years for me to be eternally grateful to her for this - that which I gave her a hard time about. She had impeccable boundaries - “not in my house”. She was clear and rarely negotiated. I think this latter part could have been softened, blurred and shared better in the relationship. I understand though.

As the woman I have become, I am realizing that though I consciously tried to become anything other than my mother - I am her in my own way. I am learning to embrace it. I am learning that the tough love or bitter medicine is needed both by me and to be given to others. I watched, On the Basis of Sex today, and Marty Ginsburg explains to their daughter that her mother is not a bully - rather her will and wit is the gift she is passing on from her mother - it’s how she shows her heart.

Take the bitter medicine, the tough love. It’s from the heart.