Waking Up Cranky

Do you ever wake up cranky? How do you respond? Wishing things were different or with an open sense of curiosity and allowing?

(I am typing this with Wally resting on my right forearm.)

This morning I woke up feeling cranky. For every imperfection, my mind was crafting a story about how that imperfection arose AND how it could be prevented. If you aren’t a cranky person, then feel free to interject a different scenario as you read this blog. The message is the same regardless of the details of the unpleasant experience.

My habit is to go right back to sleep when I realize I am waking up cranky. Definitely wishing things were different and a dose of maybe I just need more sleep? Today was different. I took care of myself yesterday. I went grocery shopping at Whole Foods at 7am before the crowds - such a luxury. I participated in a virtual creative circle, got a haircut and napped. Then went to a birthday gathering before watching a comedy film, Booksmart, and got into bed at a reasonable hour. So why cranky? Well, there are a few possibilities, but it doesn’t matter. What does matter is my relationship to the crankiness.

It’s times like this that I feel fortunate to live alone and wonder if I’ll ever find a partner who will accept my need to be a wordless zombie sometimes. I mechanically brushed my teeth. washed dishes, started the coffee and bacon. About half way through these tasks, I started crying. No story. Tears filtering through this body. I sense that there are more tears in that stream - grateful it is moving along.